To Be a Soldier's Wife

A deployment is something you can only understand if you've been through it, and we who have loved ones in warzones need all the support we can get. Not your judgement.




As we come to the tail end of this our fourth deployment, I cannot help but reflect on these past months.
In May 2009, Mark went off for training, to prepare for an upcoming mission.
In June, he left to join his new unit.
July, there was a halt: You had cancer? We need to make sure your cancer free. This is of course AFTER Mark's THIRD deployment AFTER cancer treatment was finished.
Test done, Mark is send to rejoin his unit.
Northeastern blows into Virginia. Power is out for five days and I stay with Mark's parents.
December. I contract the swine flu. Lousy Hannukkah except for the cards got off to Mark and the cards he got to me.
Feburany 2010. Mark comes home on R&R. He has a bad cold that is really a virus and leaves it with me, giving ne another bout with the Swine Flu.
I am not suppose to be getting the Swine flu: I'm Jewish!
Lungs were damaged, but slowly began to heal.
During this time, I did a lot of sleeping (to recover) reading (to stretch my brain and to learn new things) and even had a Starbucks buddy I met once a week.
To be a soldier's wife (or married to any of the branches of our armied forces) means to stand beside your soldier as they defend the nation.
It means Carepackages and letters and waiting up until 12 am for the phone to ring.
It means those special days are spend alone. And if you don't have children, like Mark and I, the lonliness wraps you like a shroul.
It means finding your voice, creating your space and keeping the home fires going for your loved one. It is knowing it is ok to cry yourself to sleep as well as to go out and have a good time with a buddy.
It is knowing that folks Support Our Troops and friends Support Their Spouses. It is knowing not everyone thinks your man is a hero, that your stupid to marry into the military and enjoys teasing you with the thought that your man is being unfaithful. Or worse; "well you married a soldier, you should have known what to expect."


It is recieveing an e-mail thanking YOU for your service to our nation. It is a child saying, "I am praying for your husband."
It is Mark telling me about the letters he recieved from Betty and the Carepackages from Isreal. About the little Iraqi girl who played with his glasses and having out footballs. It is the tribal leader shaking Mark's hand and thanking him for all he is doing for his people.
It means you are part of something bigger than yourself and dispite what the nay-sayers claim, knowing your man is working to help improve the lives of others as well as stopping the forces outside our gates that threaten us.
Frankly, I never thought growing up I would marry a military man, but G-d did. And i am so glad He had enough faith in me to chose this path for me to walk. So it is not easy; but it is worth it.
I love the man.
And as hard as this is, I have never regretted a day I said yes, I will marry you, to my soldier.
 To be a soldier's wife is a high calling. An honour. To be Mark's wife: heaven on earth.